Jokes thread

Emergence

Synchromatic
Gold Supporting Member
May 25, 2022
869
New York
I have 3 kids and I have two fond memories of songs in the car, singing / shouting all together:
It was 1992. We were on our way out to see friends in Illinois by way of Ottawa, Sudbury, and Sault St Marie because of an air show in Ottawa that was the first opportunity to see a demonstration of a MiG-29 in the western hemisphere. We saw the queen too. Unbeknownst to us, it was Canada’s 125th and she was in Ottawa for the celebration.

Long Island to Illinois and back by way of the air show, nickel mine, and Great Lakes locks. About 2500 miles in all with two kids in the back. Besides kidney kicks through the seat backs, we were treated to the uninterrupted word for word dialogue of “Spaceballs” over and over again. Non stop. No rewind. The dialogue just started over again as soon as it ended. How could a 10 and 12 year old have memorized an entire movie and not been able to memorize names and dates in school? How did we manage to drive 2500 miles without leaving them at a rest stop?
 

wabash slim

I Bleed Orange
Feb 10, 2010
19,479
lafayette in
It was 1992. We were on our way out to see friends in Illinois by way of Ottawa, Sudbury, and Sault St Marie because of an air show in Ottawa that was the first opportunity to see a demonstration of a MiG-29 in the western hemisphere. We saw the queen too. Unbeknownst to us, it was Canada’s 125th and she was in Ottawa for the celebration.

Long Island to Illinois and back by way of the air show, nickel mine, and Great Lakes locks. About 2500 miles in all with two kids in the back. Besides kidney kicks through the seat backs, we were treated to the uninterrupted word for word dialogue of “Spaceballs” over and over again. Non stop. No rewind. The dialogue just started over again as soon as it ended. How could a 10 and 12 year old have memorized an entire movie and not been able to memorize names and dates in school? How did we manage to drive 2500 miles without leaving them at a rest stop?
Two words---duct tape. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
 

wabash slim

I Bleed Orange
Feb 10, 2010
19,479
lafayette in
My dad had a wonderful voice but he only sang in the car, it feels like I can still hear him singing his favorite song and he died over 50 yrs ago.

“Just Molly and me, and the baby is three
We're so happy in my Blue Heaven”
My Dad would often sing "Ka-Ka-Ka Katie" while working in the garage or in his shop. Guess what my daughter's name is. He passed 13 years before she was born, but I'd think he'd approve.
 
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radd

Friend of Fred
Platinum Member
Dec 27, 2017
6,281
Santa Cruz
On a 400 mile drive with the family with our two girls, the 13 yr old brought a friend. The three girls sat in back and sang “Mickey” what must have been a thousand times.

As crazy as it sounds, I loved it. They had so much fun.

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine, you blow my mind
Hey Mickey, hey Mickey
Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine, you blow my mind
Hey Mickey, hey Mickey
 
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drmilktruck

Senior Gretsch-Talker
Double Platinum Member
May 17, 2009
20,923
Plymouth, MN
On a 400 mile drive with the family with our two girls, the 13 yr old brought a friend. The three girls sat in back and sang “Mickey” what must have been a thousand times.

As crazy as it sounds, I loved it. They had so much fun.

Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine, you blow my mind
Hey Mickey, hey Mickey
Oh Mickey, you're so fine
You're so fine, you blow my mind
Hey Mickey, hey Mickey


You're welcome.
 

dlew919

Country Gent
Silver Member
Jul 18, 2016
1,236
Sydney, Australia
So a visitor to a farm notices something odd. Says to the farmer - why does that pig have a wooden leg?

The farmer says, ah well that’s a long story. Would you like to hear it?

‘Yes of course.

‘So a few years back, I was ploughing and the tractor hit a hole and tipped over. I was trapped under it. No one for miles, no phone, now way of getting help. Then from out of nowhere this pig rolls a boulder over then goes and gets a large branch, makes a fulcrum and lifts the tractor high enough I could get out. Incredible.’

‘Wow. So how did he lose his leg?’

Well we’ll get to that because the next year we had severe bushfires. We were trapped in the house. The house was burning down. We thought we were dead. Then Pig here somehow drove the car through a wall getting us out. Amazing’

‘So that’s how he lost his leg?’

‘No no. The floods the next year saw us on the roof of our new house, waters rising. And it was grim. Water lapping at our feet, no hope of rescue. Then pig turns up in a boat and gets us away to safety’.

‘That’s incredible. So how did he lose his leg?’

‘Well when the pig is that tremendous you can’t eat him all at once.’
 


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